Things My Therapist Has Taught Me

Sips of Jen and Tonic

bc425f09027fd13912ac10b6728e4ea3I don’t typically write serious subject matter on this blog, but a few months ago I wrote about my desire to seek therapy for a myriad of issues I’ve faced for years. A woman of my word, I began going almost immediately.

I don’t like talking to friends or family members about my problems so the idea of talking to a stranger about my innermost thoughts really put me off. Luckily, I found someone totally aces on the first try, and she has taught me some very valuable things in our time together so far.

How you feel about yourself is not a democracy.

I would never have described myself as a “people pleaser” until I started seeing her. Now I can’t believe I never saw it before. In every facet of my life I am living for someone else: at work, in relationships, with my family, among friends. No…

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To Drop or not to Drop, That is the Question

Last week I was confronted with a difficult choice. I had just received my midterm grades for two classes; I did not do as well as I hoped. In addition to the disappointment, I also faced a decision: do I drop this course or do I remain in the class? Do I hope for the best but expect the worst? There were a lot of things to consider, but the two most glaring concerns had to do with academics and finances.

Fifteen years ago, I was a student at the University of Toronto. One of the things that I wish I had done differently was dropping courses that I was not doing well in. For instance, Introduction to Economics – I struggled in this course; by the midterm I had serious doubts about my ability to pass the course. I didn’t even consider dropping the course because I felt that it was a waste of money to do so. I also did not want to increase my OSAP debt any more than I needed to. So I remained in the course and prepared my Mom and Dad for the possibility of failure. Final Grade: 52%, D minus. Come graduation, this mark would be one of the marks that would pull down my GPA.

Fast forward to today. What to do? As a mature student, finances are probably the biggest challenge to doing well in school, the second is time management. To make this decision, I needed to put into context why I decided to return to school. I returned to school to complete an undergraduate degree with the unwavering intention to pursue graduate studies; preferably graduating with first class standing so that I am considered for scholarships and bursaries. After getting my Masters I intend to take the Canadian Foreign Services Exam and build my career as a Diplomat. To do any of this, my GPA needs to remain my first priority. Remembering this, the decision became easy – I dropped the course.

When deciding whether to drop a course or not, it’s important to remember that the decision is personal and needs to be put into the context of your life. Try and remember why you are in school and also what you need to do in order to build your future. If graduate studies is not part of your plan, then having one or two lower marks will not really matter. But if you intend to pursue graduate studies, good marks should remain your top priority. Protect your GPA! This is what I am doing my second time around.



¿Cansada o Casada?

C’est difficile d’apprendre une nouvelle langue. Imaginez-vous si vous auriez appris deux ou trois! Chez Glendon, j’apprends français et espagnol en même temps. Quelque fois, j’ai confondu les deux. C’est frustrant. Par exemple, au lieu du mot “et” en françias j’écris “y”, au lieu du mot “pero” en español, je dis “mais”. Je me confonds et la personne avec qui je parle! En fait, c’est drôle 🙂 Continue reading

Tick-tock goes the clock

Last week I had my first presentation of the year. It was for my Foreign Policy Analysis class with Professor Edelgard Mahant. This is one of my favorite classes this year. My presentation was jam-packed; so jam-packed that I went over time. This was unfortunate. When I spoke to my husband about this he suggested that in the future I enlist the help of one of my classmates. He or she can provide a signal to indicate to let you know that your time is almost up. This is a great idea! There are other things that you can do to make sure you stay on time, like rehearsing. I didn’t rehearse before this presentation and this really affected my delivery. As I usually rehearse, I know it works!

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Burning the candle at both ends

For those of you are over 30, you will know the expression “burning the candle at both ends”. That is how I feel right now. Midterms, assignments, meetings, homework, readings, tutorials, cooking, cleaning, paying bills, cleaning the cat litter – it all gets too much sometimes. I do admit I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. Continue reading